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#Regained self-esteem, self-love #Healing experience with rescued animals; volunteering #Felt the beauty of doing what I love
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“Why isn’t anyone taking care of these children? I thought it would be nice if someone could take them in and care for them, but then I realized that I could be that someone, and I decided to create a center to do just that.” It’s a simple shift in perspective, but it must have been a challenging decision to make. I felt deep respect and was happy to work alongside such individuals.
Wildlife in a Simple Daily Life: Volunteering to Care for Stray Animals in Tokushima, Japan / Yoo Hyowon Gap Year / 8 Weeks of Gap Year |
Last May, during an unusually long Golden Week, I entered what people often call a “crisis period.” According to my original plans, I should have been traveling to Europe, on a leave of absence, or at least smoothly preparing for an internship I wanted. But at that time, I had given up on my European trip, was aimlessly attending school I didn’t want to go to, and felt like I wasn’t achieving anything.
Was it because I felt a sense of leisure in May, a time that was usually busy due to my dedication to school life?
"Mom, can you lend me 300,000 won? Hey, can you lend me 100,000 won?" With their help, I decided to leave, sat at the airport for three hours, and then headed to Seoul. That was how my first ever spontaneous solo trip began.
Upon arriving in Seoul, the first thing that came to mind was gap year consulting. With a voice trembling as if I might burst into tears, I asked to schedule a consultation as soon as possible, and that marked the start of my gap year journey. A four-person room all to myself, the beer I drank that night felt unusually strong, making me toss and turn until morning. I spent the day eating alone and passing time in an unfamiliar place. Finally, with a nervous heart, I emerged from Exit 4 of Sadang Station. For two hours, I confronted the wounds I had been avoiding, and with tears streaming down, I promised myself to dedicate time just for me.
Following that, thanks to Korea Gap Year and the Jeju Provincial Office, I eagerly applied for the "21 Happy Days Finding Myself in Jeju" project. During those 21 days, I participated in three additional consultations. I spent a lot of time reflecting on myself. Seeing sides of me I didn’t know and realizing the harshness I had towards myself, I felt sorry and overwhelmed. Without a shred of doubt, I resolved to take a gap year once the project ended. As recommended during the consultation, I spent this semester on two gap year plans: studying English in the Philippines and volunteering with stray animals in Japan.
# My self-esteem was low because I couldn't love myself, and I was so busy worrying about what others thought that I didn't know what I truly liked.
My main goal during my gap year was to discover what I truly liked and to restore my low self-esteem. Through gap year consulting, I realized that while I always tried to be a good person to others, I wasn’t being good to myself. My self-esteem was low because I couldn't love myself, and I was so busy worrying about what others thought that I didn't know what I truly liked. Feeling upset with that version of myself, I wanted to change, which is why I decided to participate.
Another goal was to comfort my tired self and allow myself time to rest. I wanted to escape the pressure of always being busy and let myself relax from the mental exhaustion of dealing with people.
# They told me that instead of me healing the animals, I might feel like I’m being healed by them.
Spending my first week in Tokushima, I found myself thinking, 'What am I really supposed to feel here?' All I could do was walk with the dogs. I kept wondering, 'What can I possibly learn from repeating the same experience, walking the same route with the same dogs every day?'
When the consultants recommended this activity, they told me that volunteering with stray animals makes you feel like you are not just helping the animals, but healing yourself through them. Over time, I came to understand what that meant. At first, I was upset when the dogs tugged at their leashes as we walked, realizing it was due to their territorial instincts. But as the shy dogs slowly started to ease their guard and open their hearts, I felt truly grateful.
Since I couldn’t communicate with them, all I could do was watch them with love and take care of them. But I was always touched when the dogs recognized me, responded to my voice, and greeted me warmly. As time went on, I started remembering the dogs' faces, and even their names for some of them. Even if I couldn't remember their names, I could recall their personalities, and gradually, I began to feel attached to each one. The walks, which once seemed boring, became more enjoyable.
Each dog has its own personality, and sometimes they act really silly, and their mood changes from day to day. I promised myself that when I have a stable income in the future, I will donate to and adopt these dogs.
The two months I spent here proved that time is not short at all. During my volunteering, so many things happened. There was a time when one of the dogs ran away and got lost. I also saw a dog being abandoned in front of the center. I found the dog I had lost, and I even witnessed a dog being adopted. I feel like I experienced everything that could happen here. It was a period that reminded me of the preciousness of life and the responsibility we have for it.
# I realized that people who do what they love are beautiful.
What I felt while volunteering was that the intensity of the work was greater than I expected. Personally, I have a stronger stamina than I thought, so I usually manage tough schedules well, but on the first day of volunteering, I had muscle aches all over my body. However, the staff and organizers there, who rarely take a day off or only get one day off a week, were always smiling and quietly doing more difficult tasks, and I thought I wanted to follow their example.
Watching them, I realized that people who do what they love are beautiful. I really love dogs, but it’s not something I would want to make my profession. However, seeing the organizers there, I could feel that they treated the animals with a love that came from deep within their hearts, and at that moment, I knew I wanted to do something I truly love.
I once watched a video explaining why the operators of this center decided to establish it, and when I heard the reason, it felt like being hit on the head with a hammer. They said they thought, 'Why is no one taking care of these kids? I wish someone would take them in and care for them,' and decided to establish the center with the thought that "one of those people should be me, and I should be the one to care for them."
It was a simple shift in thinking, but I felt a sense of respect, knowing how difficult it must have been to make that decision, and I was happy to be able to join such people.
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