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#Recognizing and embracing myself; positive changes #Long-term stay in Paris; relationships with diverse people #The importance of teamwork and communication; time to focus on myself
I really enjoyed studying travel information about Paris and going out.Because guesthouses naturally involve a lot of interaction with guests, I did my best in my own way, and I loved the pattern of feeling rewarded in proportion to my efforts.I thought a lot about myself during my gap year stay. I decided to acknowledge that both the good ''me'' and the bad ''me'' are all myself. Since a person cannot have only one side, I will try to recognize and embrace even the parts of myself I dislike.
Paris, France — Gap Year Stay / Lee Hyeri, gap-year participant / 10-week gap year |
Currently, South Korea is,
Each year 60,000 middle and high school students drop out of school, 346,000 people in their twenties are idle because they have no dreams, and the one-year turnover rate after employment has entered the 40% range,75% of university students are not satisfied with college life, and more than 80% of workers do not feel happy.Many people tell them to dream, but to solve this problem that lacks practical methods and support, We aim to introduce the ''gap year'' to South Korea as well.
''Gap Year (Gapyear)''It is a time to either combine studies and work or to pause for a while and, through various activities such as volunteering, traveling, internships, education, or starting a business,set the direction to move forward — a culture encouraged in the United States, Europe, Japan, and other countries.
# Finding myself in a new environment.
If you ask me why I came to Paris, my purpose was clear.
First: to find myself through new experiences and new people.
Second: to live long-term in Paris, France.
Third: the romantic desire to try living alone abroad.
Fourth: to rest my body and mind and enjoy some leisure.
I arrived in Paris, France with these four goals.
#Working as guesthouse staff gave me a lot of inspiration.
While working at the guesthouse, I learned a lot and was greatly inspired by the people I lived with. If I tried to organize all these impressions, it could go on forever, so I''ll only summarize the main ones. First, thinking about what I felt while forming relationships with people inside the guesthouse,I felt strongly the importance of cooperation, work efficiency, and communication.
Another thing that inspired me in the staff I worked with was the importance of saying the same thing in a kinder way. As the saying goes, ''repay with words,'' the intended meaning may be the same, but how you express it can change how the other person feels, which I found enlightening.
When working in a guesthouse, situational awareness and tact are extremely important. Because there are many times you must judge the situation and decide how to act in the moment, I felt the importance of being perceptive and having good sense. I also learned that there are times when you must assert your rights or, depending on the situation, yield, serve, or make sacrifices.
I had always been aware that there is no single correct way to do a person''s work, but working together made me feel that even more strongly. So I also came to appreciate the importance of dialogue and communication. Getting a task moving through mutual dialogue and communication was likely a good experience not only for me but also for the other staff. Now that I understand communication like this, I try to do everything slowly and carefully.
Everyone has both good and bad points coexisting. Therefore, I resolved again not to judge people easily by looking at only one side.
# Time to focus on myself
I thought a lot about myself during my gap year stay. I decided to acknowledge that both the good ''me'' and the bad ''me'' are all myself. Since a person cannot have only one side, I will try to recognize and embrace even the parts of myself I dislike.
I will try not to repeat past mistakes and will strive to move closer to my own happiness. To do that, I have decided to cut out the things that make me unhappy. I will try many things to reach happiness, and I will not give up or be afraid without even trying. Thinking alone is not enough — I will try, taste, and meet everything.
I will take pride in the person I show in various situations. To build pride in myself, I plan to stop comparing myself to others and focus more on myself. In doing so, I’ve often felt that I need to be warmer and more generous toward myself.
I have decided not to give my love and effort to everyone. I can try to improve a relationship with someone I dislike, but thinking about that relationship may only make me suffer. So I intend to refrain from spending my energy on painful matters in the future.
I realized that even if I’m not good at everything and not everyone loves me, if I love myself, I’m okay as I am. This conclusion came from the thought that it’s strange for others’ views to define who I am.I will continue making efforts to become brighter and more positive for myself.
# Repetition of Joyful and Unpleasant Events
There can’t be only joyful things during guesthouse life, nor only bad things. I was no different. Looking back on my life in Paris, I will sort out the joyful and unpleasant events.
Joy
1. When the owner celebrated my birthday.
2. When, through conversations with the owner, I received advice, reached agreement, and gained trust.
3. When, even if he spoke brusquely, he used the word “family” and took care of everything that needed taking care of.
4. When one of the many grateful guests was deeply moved by the handwritten letter I wrote.
5. When a guest who had borrowed my umbrella apologized for having damaged it and gave me a new umbrella as a gift.
Unpleasant
1. When my position or living space was changed several times contrary to the existing policy.
2. When I was given tasks outside working hours that couldn’t be finished immediately.
3. When I was given too many tasks at once.
4. Even though I came for a gap year, when I felt the emotions I used to feel while working in Korea (the boss–subordinate power dynamics).
# My Guesthouse Life
I held my tension until I arrived. After arriving, a sense of relief came, and only then did expectations and curiosity about life in Paris begin. I was able to rest until my position was decided.After my position was set, I worked very hard! But the departures or transfers of fellow staff members from time to time left a larger sense of regret than I expected.
I truly enjoyed studying information for traveling in Paris and going out.Due to the nature of the guesthouse, there was a lot of interaction with guests; I did my best in my own way and really liked the pattern of feeling rewarded in proportion to my effort.
The parts of life that stressed me were frequent position changes andbeing startled and anxious by so many variables, and later feeling sick to my stomach. When moving to another guesthouse, having to face a new place and people and having to try again to adapt was also one of the stresses.
But suddenly, because the guesthouse owner went to England, I took on the morning staff duties and the manager role. I was depressed by the sense of responsibility and pressure, but I was able to overcome it thanks to two veteran juniors who had started their gap years before me, the help of a junior who moved with me when we transferred guesthouses, the consideration of the other juniors, and the owner’s trust and encouragement. Although I was lacking in many ways while working, I struggled through and was able to finish the 10 weeks of Gap Year Stay Paris.
# TwoWhat was more difficult than the work during the two months was the relationships and cooperation among the staff.
The owner Yang, whom I met at first, was a bit rough. He sometimes spoke coldly and at first I was hurt. But there were many opportunities to realize that, despite his blunt words, he was a warm person. He would occasionally come and cook delicious food and tried to send our staff on various tours. Maybe because of his daughter Seung‑ah, he became increasingly warm, spoke kindly, and encouraged us a lot, which was very encouraging.
Of course, there were times when, due to the unavoidable boss–subordinate relationship, he assigned unreasonable tasks, but I came to understand that if I were in his position, I might do the same. Everything is work done by people, so people are most important, but through the gap year I learned that a person can show different sides depending on their situation and position — because I was like that too.
While receiving the handover, I learned a lot from a staff member named Hyerim. She always behaved politely, handled tasks reliably, and even said the same things nicely. And, even if something wasn''t her responsibility, when she saw it she would help with guesthouse work as if it were her own. She worked on not only the tasks listed in the staff guidelines but also on many other duties.
2More difficult than the daily/monthly tasks was the relationships and cooperation among the staff.To keep that harmonious and stable requires everyone''s effort and communication.
Before I knew it, when I was the one giving handovers and managing staff as a manager, I surprisingly felt a generational gap.Very young staff often did exactly what they were told and tended to focus on themselves rather than the whole. Focusing on oneself isn''t bad, but since we all chose to come here, that means they need a sense of responsibility for their work. If they focus on personal matters over tasks, because of the nature of the work it can harm other staff.Therefore, mediating and communicating in the middle was important.
# I met French friends and talked about various things. It was something I had only imagined, but it became reality.
As my gap year was drawing to a close and I became anxious, I made time to visit the outskirts of France.
I went to Fontainebleau Palace and then to the village of Sisley, where I met my first French friend, Angie, and in Paris we talked about various things related to France.I met my second French friend Sebastian and his dog Yuna like in a picture in a wheat field where crows were flying. These kinds of things...which could only have happened in my imagination became reality.
In Chartres, near Paris, the Festival of Lights started in April, and I was lucky enough to visit with guests. The emotion when Ave Maria echoed with lights in front of Notre-Dame Cathedral... I''ll never forget it.
I also had a glass of champagne, elegantly enjoyed at the Montparnasse Tower.I think I tried and challenged many things I wouldn''t have done if I were in Korea, simply because I was abroad.
# My recommended Europe travel routes!
First recommended route
Prague (Czech Republic) - Budapest (Hungary) - Paris (France) - London (United Kingdom) - Santorini - Milan (Italy) - Florence (Italy) - Rome (Italy) - Nice (France) - Lyon (France)
Second recommended route
Paris (France) - Split (Croatia) - Dubrovnik (Croatia) - the Cotswolds (United Kingdom) - Oxford (United Kingdom) - Bath (United Kingdom) - London (United Kingdom) - Dublin (Ireland)
Things that left an impression during the trip
Czech Republic: Opera house. Puppet show.
Budapest: Hot springs. Night cruise highly recommended.
London: Double-decker buses. Musicals. Parks. Recommended.
Santorini: Assorted seafood. Sunset. Donkey trekking.
Split: Simply recommended. Beautiful. Sunset cruise recommended.
# I think I''ve gained the leisure to wait for myself. Even if I don''t do everything well, even if not everyone loves me, it''s okay as I am now.
Through this gap year project I was able to meet many people, and I received a lot of learning and stimulation from them.Through other people and various situations I came to see myself. "I should learn that." "I shouldn''t learn that." "That person is really charming." "That person is not." Amid countless judgments, in the end it''s me. So what am I like — is this okay as is? Am I a beautiful and good person? Do I have to be that way? Would I only be valuable if so? I think I had such worries. I''m still worrying..
I could be pretty and also ugly; graceful and also stubborn; kind and also wicked like a devil.I used to pursue perfection.I think that made me torment myself. Of course it''s still the case now, but I seem to have gained a little more patience with myself. That it''s okay not to do everything well, not everyone has to love me, not to be good — that it''s okay as I am right now.
Through traveling, I, who am a coward, became a little bolder.(Of course I''m still a scaredy‑cat though, lol)Even though I''m so fearful, I''m someone whose ambition is greater than their fear.
Another thing I newly realized isYou can''t know anything until you experience it yourself.Prague may be everyone''s fantasy, but for me it was a place that left me unmoved. Someone might say this is the best food, but I thought differently. Just as someone who is the worst person to one person can be the best person to another, it''s important to experience things yourself and make them your own in your own way. In that way...I thought that perhaps growing up is repeating the cycle of wavering, communicating, becoming resolute again.
Looking back on my gap year, it ultimately came down to people.During that short two‑month period, people were difficult and people made me happy. Building a guesthouse is, after all, about people.What helped me grow were ultimately the warm words and advice of the people around me.
It''s hard to judge for now, but before leaving for my gap year and now, I don''t seem to have changed much on the surface.
But I''m definitely different.
# Empathy and teamwork are the most important abilities when working at a guesthouse.
If you are sensitive and place a high value on personal privacy, this lifestyle may be difficult, so I recommend you think it over carefully before joining the project.
