第61位间隔年体验者朴昭妍

间隔年时间：2016年4月—2016年7月（共12周）

辞职后，我前往曼谷做志愿者，寻找人生的意义。

如今的韩国，

每年有6万名初高中学生辍学，20多岁的人中有34.6万人因为没有梦想而无所事事，就业一年内的离职率也已达到40%以上，据说，75%的大学生对大学生活不满意，80%以上的职场人士也感受不到幸福。很多人都在谈“梦想”，却没有实际可行的方法或支持。为了解决这个问题，我们希望将“间隔年”也引入韩国。

间隔年是暂时放下学业或工作，参与志愿服务、旅行、实习、学习、创业等各种活动的一段时间，也是决定未来方向的时期，在美国、欧洲和日本都受到鼓励。

*欢迎访问间隔年网站，了解各种体验！（点击）

# 不知从何时起，我已经不习惯休息了。

不知从何时起，我已经不习惯休息了。我想自己只是一直不停地向前奔跑，以至于什么都不做就会感到焦虑。大学毕业后，我马上就找到了工作，工作了将近两年。工作带来了压力，不过……不知道为什么，我的身体一天比一天疲惫，脾气也变得越来越敏感、尖锐。我想自己渐渐体会到了勉强度过每一天是什么感觉。

就这样一忍再忍，某天我忽然冒出了这样的想法。

“这样生活真的好吗？还有那么多事情没尝试过，难道我要一辈子只顾着工作吗？”

虽然我知道总有一天还会重新工作，但如果只靠工作积累职业经历，却没有体验或尝试任何事情，我觉得实在太浪费时间了。而且也让我感到害怕。

于是，我开始思考自己喜欢什么，重新考虑了研究生院——之前因为现实原因，我连想都不敢想。可我觉得，不能只是盲目地准备考研，还应该做些更有意义的事。于是……我决定把2016年当作送给自己的休假年，选择度过一个间隔年。

一开始看着银行余额，我很担心自己是不是真的可以过间隔年。不过，我刚工作时曾跟着一位同事开过一个储蓄账户。我开了两个自动转账的储蓄账户，没想到决定过间隔年时，其中一个账户正好到期，所以我比较从容地准备好了资金。

多亏了那位同事，这笔钱得到了很好的利用，直到现在也是如此。辞职后到出发前，我还做了一份短期兼职，多攒了些旅行经费。以前这些钱会被我花在零食或生活开销上，一下子投入这么大一笔钱让我有些担心，但现在回想起来，我觉得这是我花得最有用、最值得的一笔钱。

# 我真的很庆幸自己告诉了身边的人，我要出发了。

准备过程中最艰难的事，是出发前一个月我严重扭伤了脚踝，不得不打上石膏，每天去诊所。虽然我装作无所畏惧、很勇敢的样子，但其实我相当胆小。我哭了很多次，也担心了很久。脚踝受伤、打着石膏，再加上有关寨卡病毒和东南亚的各种说法，说实话，我非常害怕。

所以我甚至怀疑，这是不是上天在暗示我别过间隔年，是不是不该去。但我已经把间隔年的事告诉了身边的人，也已经辞了职……这件事真的已经无法挽回了。最后我还是决定出发。幸运的是，出发前一周拆掉了石膏，我可以正常走路了，于是就去了泰国。那一刻，我觉得自己真的很庆幸，已经告诉了身边的人我要出发。

#我觉得这事非此时不可，于是决定让2016年顺着生活的潮流自然向前。

起初，很多人都很担心，我自己也想了很多，不过，我想着错过这次就再也没有机会了，于是决定让生活的潮流带着自己走过2016年。辞职后，我突然有了很多时间。去泰国之前，我试着自己写书，白天沿着汉江散步，去听自己感兴趣的讲座，还花时间做了那些一直想尝试的事。

我也开始体会到什么是真正简单而微小的幸福。过去的我总是忙忙碌碌，当我慢下来后，连一直生活其中却不曾留意的首尔都变得陌生而新鲜，一直陪伴在身边的家人和朋友，也仿佛焕然一新。

享受了一个月慢节奏的生活后，我终于怀着满心期待前往泰国。刚到中心的前两周非常单调，因为我被分配去的学校还没开学。整整一天，我都在给一位即将去挪威留学的朋友上英语课，下午则帮国际学校的小朋友做作业。

当然，那位即将出国留学的朋友有时会因为想念同学而难过一整天，也有时候，我得哄一哄不想做作业的小朋友。

五月初，学校陆续开学，课程也正式开始了。我上的课比中心里的其他志愿者都多：上午9点到11点要教四节课。给那些可爱的孩子上课时，我并不介意满头大汗；但遇上气温接近40度、只能靠电风扇上两小时课的日子，回家时我已经筋疲力尽。

或许是因为四月底和五月初最热，项目结束时，我已经完全适应了，几乎感觉不到热了。确实，一旦适应了某件事，好像就没有什么是应付不了的。

下午没有课时，我会去一家泰语培训学校上课。和在中心的生活不同，跟来自许多国家的人一起学习，不仅让我学会了泰语，也让我对泰国有了更多了解。有被派驻到这里的外派人员、有今年在泰国工作的自由职业者，也有以游客身份前来、爱上这个国家后决定留下来的人，等等——真的，我了解到，生活方式原来可以如此多样。

遇见那些过着与我所熟悉的生活截然不同的人，拓宽了我的视野。上完泰语课回到中心后，我又从学生变回老师，帮小朋友做作业，还给12至14岁的孩子上晚课。早上是老师，下午是学生，晚上又是老师——清晨和傍晚在贫民区，下午则在热闹的城区，感觉一天之内仿佛过着两种截然不同的生活。

Wednesdays were discount days at the cinema, so I sometimes went to the movies; on weekends I went out to eat delicious food with friends or toured Bangkok's sights alone; on long holidays I took planes to visit other cities, managing to juggle volunteering, studying, and travel. That's how I spent my time in Bangkok — relaxed yet busy.

#There seemed to be so many happy moments.

There seemed to be so many happy moments.The first day I taught a class, the first day a little child gave me a kiss, the day I met the family of a student at the market, the day the children gave me flowers on Teacher's Day, dancing and singing with the kids, the moments when children ran to hug me at the end of class — almost every moment was so pure and beautiful.

Among them, the most memorable episode was when I accompanied a little friend to a birthday party as their guardian. The child attended a fairly expensive international school with assistance, and at the party most of the children were expatriates' kids or children of Thailand's upper class.

I worried inwardly that the child might be misunderstood or ostracized, but one of the parents said she had worked for an NGO, understood the situation, and even expressed that she hoped to help the center by donating clothes and items she no longer used. After that, she personally brought toys and children's clothes, and what I remember most is that every time we met she cheered me on, saying I was doing a really good thing.

And the hardest moment was when a snake appeared in my house. It was the rainy season and the news was full of reports of snakes coming out of toilets and biting people's bottoms, so at the Thai school we joked to each other "watch out for snakes today" and then I went home — the very next day, while showering, a python rose up through the drain and I truly thought I would faint.

That accommodation wasn't a place where pythons usually appeared, but it had rained heavily where I was that day. Naked with just a towel, I screamed and ran out, barely managed to change clothes and get help, but I couldn't calm down and my hands were shaking. I was so frightened I even took a traditional herbal calming pill and evacuated into Bangkok proper to stay with a friend.

Even at that accommodation everyone was surprised since it had never happened before. They took measures to prevent pythons from coming out again, but I couldn't stay in that house and moved to another. I had heard before that snakes enter sewers to avoid heat or rain, and when I lived in Phuket I had seen a snake by the roadside, but when it actually happened right in front of me I couldn't calm down at all. Looking back I guess I overreacted, but at the time I was so scared I couldn't even wash my hands inside the house.

#I had been rushing through life without a single pause, but recently I feel like I can finally breathe a little.

After taking a gap year, I don't think anything has changed drastically for me personally. There was no grand revelation like my life changing, my dreams changing, or becoming certain about something. The biggest change is simply that my daily routine changed and my perspective on the world shifted a bit.

I had been rushing through life without even a pause, but these days I feel like I can breathe a little. I learned how to live more leisurely and how to notice the things immediately around me. Realizing that there are so many ways of living and so many stories in the world that I had been unaware of has made me see the world from a somewhat different perspective.

Also, I didn't notice it myself, but recently I often hear that my smile has become prettier. When I heard that and compared it with older photos, I realized I'm smiling much more widely than before. Maybe because I spend a lot of time with children and laugh more, smiling has become more natural on my face.

The gap year project is over, but my personal sabbatical is still ongoing. Last week I traveled to Singapore with my college friends under the name RE-UNION, and this coming weekend I'm planning to get my open-water scuba diving license. After that, I'm thinking of taking a short trip to southern Thailand and then to northern Thailand.

Also, recently I was able to get a round-trip ticket to the U.S. for almost the price of a one-way ticket, so I'll be going to the U.S. for about ten days to meet friends and travel. I don't know when I'll get another opportunity like this, so I'm trying to do everything. When I return to Korea, I will probably start seriously preparing for graduate school. Of course, if I get a job related to the field I want to study, I might not attend graduate school.

It's still unclear what kind of work I'll do when I return to Korea, but whatever it is, I want to live doing meaningful and valuable work.

# Tips for those considering a gap year

1) Don't be afraid– It's kind of like a roller coaster. While waiting and preparing you feel nervous, excited, worried, and scared, but once you're on it, it rushes by before you even have time to feel much. When you get off and look back, even the things that scared you become remembered as very fun and enjoyable memories.

2) Go with the flow– Wherever you go or whatever you do, unfamiliar things you haven't experienced before will happen. It might be an unfamiliar environment, unfamiliar people, or an unfamiliar culture.

If you try to interpret everything according to the memories and experiences you've had so far, there may be many things that are hard to understand or accept. However, accepting things to some extent and going with it seems to be the quickest way to adapt.

3) Don't be impulsive– If you haven't decided on a gap year yet, I recommend thinking it over once more. I don't think you should start a gap year impulsively or because you're swept up in it. That would be a true waste of time, money, and energy, wouldn't it?

Especially, if you are working like I am, you should be even more cautious.Unlike students who can simply return to school, you may not have a place to return to after a gap year, so it's important to clearly define what you want to try enough to give up your current stable job, and why you want to do it.If you still feel you really must do it and that there's no time like the present, gather your courage and start.

#You've worked hard.

To those planning a gap yearRather than vague encouragement about the future, I'd like to tell them, "You've worked hard."This was something my senior at work said to me when I resigned, and hearing "you've worked hard" was the most touching. It made me feel that I had lived hard enough to deserve hearing that, and it somehow gave me more courage.

These days many people are being pushed around and live without even a moment to reflect on themselves; I think it's important to take time to feel who you are. You've done well so far :)

'The 100 Gap Year Gappers' are not mentors who exist on TV or in books.They are the stories of people who were a little braver and took that bravery a little earlier than I did.We hope the stories of 100 people who were in similar situations and had similar concerns will offer some small help when you face important decisions in your life.

Recommendations and submissions for the 100 Gap Yearers are always welcome.

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